Question:
I'm taking a health psychology course in school, and am amazed at just
how much I'm getting out of it, in terms of applying it to life, and
analyzing shyness and how to continually hack away on this challenging
real-life problem solving exercise.
Health psyc. basically is about reducing illness and increasing
wellness behaviors, along the lines of proper nutrition and exercise,
managing stress, changing behaviors, increasing self-esteem and the
like. It is a nice inter-relation between social, physical, and
psychological variables and is why I like it so much. For those
interested in this sort of stuff, I strongly advise you to take a
course in it, and/or read books on these topics.
One of the recurring themes in developing healthy wellness behaviors is
that of managing stress and increasing self-efficacy. Researchers
Seligman and Bandura have done the most research on self-efficacy (1),
basically it involves a sense of "I can do it" in relation to life's
challenges.
Answer:
There is also a downward spiral effect assosciated with this. One
negative experience dealing with people (i.e. getting rejected) can
lead to developing a belief that "I can't talk to people right" or
something like that, and affect subsequent interactions. On the plus
side, succeeding in social interactions can bring more confidence and
efficacy, to boost subsequent interactions.
Some positive ways to boost self-efficacy and reduce stress are as
follows, and they have worked extremely well for me:
- go for a run. I suggest at least 20 mins a day, 3 days a week.
- bulk up. Go to the gym and do lots of reps on the chest and leg
presses, for instance.
- do some hiking
- perform speeches in front of a group
- play a musical instrument
- practice cognitive and behavioral therapy
- read books
- set goals for yourself on a daily basis
- track your successes each day, no matter how minor
- relax your muscles, and practice breathing exercises
Now, although these are extremely good methods, and self-help and
psychology texts can list many more, there are other components to the
problem that don't get discussed often - and that is the *source* of
the stress, the stressors.
While psyc texts and self-help books do an excellent job on discussing
"street-level" techniques on how to reduce stress and interact with
others more effectively, they don't devote nearly as much time to
analyzing the larger forces, and environmental factors which much of
the stress can be traced back.
Stress management is like learning how to drive in a traffic jam. You
know the traffic is there, you hate it, it sucks, but you have an
arsenal of techniques at your disposal to deal with it effectively, and
remain sane. I am suggesting analyzing why the traffic jam exists in
the first place, and finding alternative streets to drive on - or not
to drive at all.
In our society, we are plagued with environmental stressors. The level
of stimulation that we must contend with in our day-to-day lives is
chronically high, and responsible for all kinds of social ills, shyness
being just the tip of the iceberg. We aren't biologically equipped to
deal with all this chronic stress, as well, considering our fast-paced
cultural evolution has outstripped our biological ability to keep up.
As a result, we live in a social system that is toxic, and it can
affect us in all kinds of ways. Not knowing this fact, can hurt you,
and part of any decent stress management should include learning and
understanding the environment we're all a part of, and finding ways
around the system. There's no "escaping" society, that wouldn't be
possible, but there are creative ways to regain portions of your
sanity, and increase your energy required to tackle the daily grind,
and hence your self-efficacy.
Some suggestions along this line are as follows:
- take time out of school/work and spend an hour or so in a quiet place
with nobody around to disturb you. Just let your thoughts go. I
suggest a forest, but if that's not possible, then sit in your office
and close the door.
- try and get at least 8 hours of sleep a night, and wear earplugs if
there is too much noise.
- schedule activities in advance, so that you know what you're doing,
and can prepare for them.
- if you are expecting stressful events, such as a presentation, then
get extra sleep the night before, and give yourself plenty of time to
relax and prepare ahead of time.
- avoid saying yes to everyone. Know how much you can do in a given
day, and refuse taking on commitments which go beyond your limit.
Don't worry if you're not doing as much as you "should" be, or
comparing yourself to what others are.
- take the productivity label off of yourself. You are a human being,
and who you are is more important than what you do for a living.
- don't buy into society's script of perfection, and "Go your own
way!" "Be all you can be!" "Rise to the top" kind of brainwashing.
Develop your own values
- Resist peer pressure and advertising messages
I strongly believe in being pro-active, and that requires a throrough
understanding and analysis of both our culture and ourselves. Knowing
how to navigate the street-level of stress management is important, but
also is recognizing how we live in a society that is unbelievably
complex and chaotic, and also detrimental to our health and well-
being. The solution, therefore, is to recognize this FACT, and find
creative ways to live a fulfilling life nonetheless.
